Between You & God

Recently I have been in discussion with several members of my family as well as co-workers about the difficulty of desiring to live for the Lord and the resulting persecution that occurs.  This can and does ocurr often with those we love who do not appreciate our hearts desire to be like Jesus, especially if they do not know him as their Lord and Savior.  Whether we are in the workplace, in school or connecting with family and friends, if we truly love the Lord and desire to be like Him, we need to assume that someone will be offended.  

Talking with a co-worker, she shared how her daughter is being harrassed at school by another student.  Day after day she deals with riducule and actions that are designed to provoke her into a confrontation.  Being called "sissy" and other hurtful comments can cause pain in the core of our being and if we are not careful cause us to respond with retaliation.  I was so proud of this young girl who was provoked by the actions of another student, and chose to focus on  "how would Jesus respond".  As a result she walked away even in the midst of the name calling from the crowd in the cafeteria.

Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they don’t know what they are doing.”  I think it is incedibly important that we learn to respond His way because it is the best protection against a hardened heart. Forgiving those who wrong us, keeps us moving forward for the Lord.   He knew people would be vengeful, jealous and that they would run from His ways if they chose not to love Him.  It is the way of the world to be an enemy of God.  In John 15:18-26 Jesus says,
“If the world hates you, remember that it hated me first.  The world would love you as one of its own if you belonged to it, but you are no longer part of the world. I chose you to come out of the world, so it hates you.  Do you remember what I told you? ‘A slave is not greater than the master.’ Since they persecuted me, naturally they will persecute you. And if they had listened to me, they would listen to you.  They will do all this to you because of me, for they have rejected the One who sent me.  They would not be guilty if I had not come and spoken to them. But now they have no excuse for their sin.  Anyone who hates me also hates my Father. ²⁴ If I hadn’t done such miraculous signs among them that no one else could do, they would not be guilty. But as it is, they have seen everything I did, yet they still hate me and my Father.  This fulfills what is written in the Scriptures: ‘They hated me without cause.’ But I will send you the Advocate—the Spirit of truth. He will come to you from the Father and will testify all about me."


Being friends with God is a far better position to be in and is important to remember when we are hurt by those we love.  Having family members or very close friends working to bring a follower of Christ  down causes great pain but it is the "natural" approach for those who do not choose to have a personal relationship with God.

Our challenge is to decide each time we are hurt, that our commitment to Jesus Christ is of more value than being liked or accepted by those around us.  This is especially hard when those who hurt us are family members or those we consider to be close friends.   Remember Jesus understood rejection better than we could imagine and will comfort us during these moments.

Recently as I was going through a stack of papers that I had kept for encouragement, I found a quote by Mother Teresa.  This quote describes the thought process we should have as we face discouragement from others.  Remember it is really between you and God and not between you and others.

People are often unreasonable and self-centered.

FORGIVE THEM ANYWAY.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of ulterior motives.

BE KIND ANYWAY.

If you are honest, people may cheat you.

BE HONEST ANYWAY.

If you find happiness, people may be jealous.

BE HAPPY ANYWAY.

The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow.

DO GOOD ANYWAY.

Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough.

GIVE YOUR BEST ANYWAY.

For you see, in the end, it is between you and god.

NEVER WAS BETWEEN YOU AND THEM ANYWAY.

Mother Teresa 

The "New" Normal

Recently, I did a devotional for a group of ladies at my church as we met for our night of "Learning Inspired through Fellowship & Encouragement (LIFE 101).  I had really struggled to share with them because I wanted to impact and make a difference as I spoke. I wanted to tell them something that maybe would challenge and encourage in such a way that I would make a difference.  I thought for weeks on what to talk about and then chided myself for taking so much "thinking" time for a 15 minute devotional.  Eventually (the night before) my husband reminded me that God wants us to speak to others from our hearts and as is often the case through our own challenges and lessons.  So I sat for a while and realized that the Lord had really impacted me with a devotional from a book on cancer that I was reading for a friend.  As a result I became keenly aware that God provides opportunities for us to step out in faith and that many times we are "pushed out, as is the case with cancer"*.  

So below is the devotional I gave and I hope you will be challenged to look at God's Word and the power and love He will impart to you if you are willing to be challenged to accept the "new normal" you find yourself in.  It is not a matter of why things happen but rather how we can meet them with the faith and love already provided by our Savior.   

Be challenged friends.... He is just waiting for you to step out in Him. 

Ephesians 3:14-19

“When I think of the wisdom and scope of God’s plan, I fall to my knees and pray to the Father, 15) the Creator of everything in heaven and on earth.  16) I pray that from his glorious, unlimited resources he will give you mighty inner strength through his Holy Spirit.  17) And I pray that Christ will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in him.  May your roots go down deep into the soil of God’s marvelous love.  18) And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love really is.  19) May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God. 

This section in my Bible is entitled “Paul’s Prayer for Spiritual Empowering”. As I thought about what to talk about, I realized that so much has changed in my life and I am learning the “new normal” that God is asking of Gary and I.  Gary started a job today that was an answer to prayer but the death of a dream.    I gave up being home after 35 years to work and help Gary keep us from losing everything. It has been a real challenge and many times I am very tired and wish God would let us have what we had before.   However, I am learning much about God’s love these days.  I am learning that this “new normal”, while very stretching is just what I need to move forward in my growth.  I have prayed and prayed, “Lord, please help me to keep growing…… Lord, I want to keep learning and growing.”  Then he puts me in the stretching growth mode and I go “Why” Lord…. Why is this happening this way?  

I recently read a devotional* about a woman who was battling cancer and she learned much about God’s provision and love through the story of Gideon.  She says, “God told Gideon to raise up an army to fight the Midianites. After needing much confirmation, Gideon gathered close to forty thousand men.  Then God told him there were too many! The ranks were narrowed until only three hundred men remained.  The Lord then explained that He was keeping the army small so that the Israelites would not boast in their own strength but would know that the Lord saved them.”   She continues by challenging us to look to God to do extraordinary things….. Instead of asking “WHY Lord?” she says to ask, “HOW Lord?”   

 This has really impacted my thinking.  I want to challenge you tonight to consider the “how’s” of God and not necessarily the “why’s”.     Ephesians 1:19, says, “I pray that you will begin to understand the incredible greatness of his power for us who believe him.”    I pray this for you and for myself. That we would truly take God’s love to heart and stop asking Him why in the areas we do not understand, but rather how and what……

1.  What do you want me to learn Lord?

2.  How can I bring you honor through this?

3.  What can I do to help others know you are working on my behalf?

4.  How can I take what you are doing and bring you honor and glory as a result?

Tonight I would like to challenge you to take some of the why questions you have and turn them into “how” questions and then remind yourself of the incredible love God has for you and rest in that love while you watch him work on your behalf.  If we cannot embrace His love and claim His power than how are we different from the world? 

Let’s remember on those days when we are tempted to ask why, Ephesians 3:14-19.  Let me read it again for you---

“When I think of the wisdom and scope of God’s plan, I fall to my knees and pray to the Father, 15) the Creator of everything in heaven and on earth.  16) I pray that from his glorious, unlimited resources he will give you mighty inner strength through his Holy Spirit.  17) And I pray that Christ will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in him.  May your roots go down deep into the soil of God’s marvelous love.  18) And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love really is.  19) May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God. 

Conclusion…..

I challenge you and myself to embrace God’s love for us as we set our roots deep into the soil of that love.  Then we can proclaim Ephesians 3:20 “Now glory be to God!  By his mighty power at work within us, he is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope.  

Let’s pray…..

Lord, you know all things. You know our needs and what each one of us must go through in order to draw closer to you. You know what each of us must go through  to grow and to bring you honor and glory.  We would probably not choose the process that you will give us to operate in your power and love. So I ask you to remind each of us of your power, and your love as we learn to step out in faith --for some of us we may need to be pushed to embrace the “new Normal” you have chosen.  Please "enlighten the eyes of our hearts so that we may know what is the hope" to which you have called us. 

Amen. 

*Praying through Cancer by Susan Sorensen/Laura Geist

LifeGiving Mentors.....

It has been some time since I posted last.  Time has a way of running on by you if you are not careful.  In April my son was married and shortly after our arrival in Florida my computer was stolen.  You never know how much you use something until it is no longer there.  At first I thought it would not be a bit deal but as time went on access to a computer became harder and harder.  So I now have a new computer and am catching up on everything that I had been a part of before that point. 


I recently signed up to participate in a mentoring program through my job. I have been paired with 2 ladies whom I have yet to interact, but am looking forward to building a relationship with them over the next year.   Guidelines were put in place for what I believe will be an effective program of building into each other's lives.  


One of the tools for the Mentor that was sent was a book that I found to be one of the best resources for this area entitled lifeGiving Mentors by Tim Elmore.  Tim does an excellent job of writing in "snippets" allowing for a quick refueling for the long time mentors or training for the first timers.  This book is not designed just for women or even just for mentors, but is written for those in leadership who want to understand the younger generations and who are working to develop relationships that make a difference.  I highly recommend this book.  On page 82 he gives the Qualities of a Good Mentor and lists six which should define one's character if he/she is planning on venturing into the challenge of leading others and making a difference. 


These are simple guidelines to consider about yourself as you work with the Lord in establishing mentoring relationships.  You may be stretched in some areas but prayerfully ask the Lord to help you develop and strengthen these so you can, effectively and confidently through the Holy Spirit, offer yourself as His tool in the lives of others. 


1.  INITIATIVE

• I provide direction to my relationship with my menthe and sphere of influence.
• I take responsibility for the health of the relationship.
• I initiate spiritual dialogue with vulnerability and humility. 

2.  INTIMACY

• I experience healthy intimacy with my family or roommates with whom I live. 
• I experience intimacy with my menthe through open and honest conversation. 

3.  INFLUENCE

• I exercise healthy influence in my relationship with my mentee.
• I develop, encourage and facilitate growth in my mentee.
• I am a "giver," a generous contributor in relationships.

4.  INTEGRITY

• I lead a life of integrity and honesty that is above reproach. 
• I am not ashamed of my "private" world, of who I am when no one is looking.

5.  IDENTITY

• I am secure in who I am; I am OK with how my personality is wired. 
• I have a healthy self-image that prevents a defensive attitude. 
• I have developed a mature statement of purpose for my life. 

6. INNER CHARACTER

• I exhibit self-discipline; I base my life on principles not emotions. 
• I am considered a person of strong character and one who models integrity.
• I do not allow my gifts to carry me further than my character can sustain me. 

As you consider each of these areas and remember the Lord reinforces these qualities within His Word as well.  Read Psalm 15 and Psalm 101 as you establish your mentoring goals. 

I highly recommend lifeGiving Mentors (and "no" I am not forgetting to capitalize the first letter of the title). I know you will find it useful and enlightening as you learn more about the mentoring process.  

Ministry starts with God

Recently I have been working on Bible Studies that emphasize intimacy with God. As I have been talking with the Lord and reading my Bible, I have been challenged with my relationship with Him.  How does one effectively minister if God has not been made the first priority? Time and time again God will direct me differently than I would have chosen when I give Him the reins of my life and trust Him.  He can direct and I can hear Him when I give him time and I focus on my relationship with Him.  

In the book, Practicing the Presence of God, Brother Lawrence continually makes radical statements that cause one to stop and evaluate intimacy with God. Comments like, "I have no idea how Christians can live satisfied lives without practicing the presence of God," or "Make it a habit to give Him your whole heart and life, not just once but daily.  Even if you're on a busy schedule.  Every minute of every day, if you can.  Don't just go through the motions of worship strictly by the book, locked into the same devotional script all the time.  No, try this:  worship God in faith by believing that He honestly wants to know you better.  Do what you do out of love."  

 Practicing the presence of God starts with what Francis Chan calls in his book, Crazy Love, a "reverential fear" and an understanding that God is waiting to spend quality time with you.  If you move beyond the "habits" of religious activities such as devotions every day at the same time or church whenever the doors are open and instead ask God to give you a hunger and desire to meet with Him, you may begin to build an intimacy that will direct your life and ultimately the way you minister and to whom you ministry in ways you never dreamed possible.    I am not saying to stop attending church or stop doing activities you are involved in but rather to evaluate your intentions....are you checking God and church off your list or are you meeting with Him and others for worship and intimacy at spiritual levels?

Intimacy with God can be developed individually or with a group of women who desire to move forward in their love for their Lord.  I recently concluded a Bible Study by Nancy Leigh DeMoss called, Choosing Gratitude, where meeting with a small group of ladies was a privilege and challenged me in my understanding of the ways God draws each person to Himself.  We all shared and it was great fun to see each one learning something just a little different based on her place of need and desire to grow.  

Intimacy starts with time--time with the God of the Universe who is seeking you to give a love and intimacy that no one else can fulfill but Him.  Find what works for you and if you don't know then ask God to direct you.  Years ago I claimed Jeremiah 33:3 which says, "Call to Me and I will answer you, and will tell you great and hidden things that you have not known."  He has never let me down.

Talk to Him.  Listen for Him.  Prepare to be challenged to move out of your comfort zone and to be blessed.

I would love to hear from you ways God has given you direction for intimacy with Him.  If you have books, Verses, or ways God has led you to grow, please share with us so we can continue this journey together.

Women's Retreats

This weekend I was able to have Saturday all to myself. I so very seldom have alone time but when I do I always start thinking about what I can learn to pass on to other women for growth.  I get so excited about things that will help make a difference in the lives of women for Christ.  I love finding things that I could pass on to other women for their own ministries.  So, today I ran across Creating a Standout Women's Retreat. 

This is a conversation by two ladies who work in ministry for women and are being interviewed about tips for planning a women's retreat.  Listening to them, I was excited because it was one of the most balanced and defined conversations that I have heard to help women interested in retreat planning. These ladies discuss retreats, conferences and ways for all size churches to build and meet the needs of their ladies.  I strongly suggest you take a few minutes to listen to this podcast if you are part of a group planning a retreat OR if you just want to get excited about retreats in general.  It is excellent.  http://ministryservingministry.com/2010/03/30/creating-a-standout-womens-retreat/

Creating a stand out retreat is something many women start now to think about for spring or fall.  Retreats take a lot of careful planning but the results can be incredible and life changing.  Retreats are a great way to impact others in spiritual and relational growth in the name of Christ. As one who works at a retreat center and works with many types of womens group for retreats, I know how much it takes to put something effective together for growth and relational building.  I often talk with the committee members numerous times before they actually arrive to ensure the details are covered.

If you are interested in a retreat and plan to do one at an offsite location from your church, such as a retreat center, be sure to begin looking for a place early.  You want to be in the position of having options rather than having to compromise your desires because space is no longer available.  A good rule of thumb is to start looking no less than 6 months to a year ahead.  The size of your group will determine the time frame with which you should begin the process. If you have a group of 20-30 women you can wait longer in some cases than you can if you are planning for a  group of 100 or more.  Also, realize that certain months of the year may be more popular than others and you will need to plan accordingly in reserving your space.

If you have an interest in participating in a retreat or are in a group wanting to plan one, take time to listen to these two women from LifeWay who really know the inner workings of planning a retreat and share candidly about it. You will be inspired to step out to make a difference with your women's retreat.

Defining Mentoring.....

My passion for as long as I can remember has been 3 fold:

• ·        To be used by the Lord- (even as a young teenager I actually wrote a song about this….and would sing it in the shower whenever I was overwhelmed with life.) 
• ·        To move forward in growth—I have always wanted to grow and would often irritate people because I was always asking questions about EVERYTHING.  I claimed Jeremiah 33:3 as my life verse because it said,  "Call to Me and I will answer you, and I will tell you great and mighty things, which you do not know.'
• ·        To impact other women—As long as I can remember I have desired to help women want to be used by the Lord and to grow in their own walk.  

I always like to define Mentoring with the quotes from 2 ladies I thought penned it well:

   “A mentor is a trusted counselor, guide, tutor, coach”                                                               Donna Otto, Scottsdale, Arizona.”     

 “Someone who shares God-given wisdom with someone else on a regular basis with the aim of encouraging that person in bite-sized bits to live a life that is pleasing to God.”  Paula Scantlebury, Fairfields-Sunnyside, England

 
In other words, Mentoring is the giving of oneself in a relationship building format.  

I especially love Paula's definition because it is something I know I can take in and develop. 

Consider today how you can impact others and please ask God to give you one bite-sized bit to share that He gave you this past year.    

Start the New Year considering your mentoring goals.  Take up the challenge to make a difference in the life of just one other woman who needs a bite-sized bit of God’s that He has given to you to share. 

You may very well be mentoring and not even know it. 

 

 Have a great week! 

Excited to Begin 2011!

It is the first day of the New Year and I am excited to have a Blog. This is my first "real" blog and I hope to share with anyone who will participate with me ideas and thoughts about mentoring.  As I look at this new year which is moving into place I realize several things:


First, regardless of how old I am, I want to end well. 2 Timothy 4:7 says, "I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, and I have remained faithful."NLT   This is so important to me. I have raised a family, ministered with women for 30+ years and have learn so much about people, but more importantly I have learned that I want to be in growth mode till the last breath I take. Learning and sharing with others is one of God's greatest gifts to us.  Growing and transforming through the light of truth in our minds and hearts gives us an opportunity to pass that light on to someone else.  To have the satisfaction of seeing the light switch on in the heart and mind of another makes the circle of growth complete.  


Second, regardless of our age, we can grow and regardless of what we think we excel in, there are gifts we have that can be passed on to others.  The Psalmist shares in Psalm 78 the importance of passing on God's greatness and impact on our lives to the next generations.  Verse 4 says, "We will not hide these truths from our children; we will tell the next generation about the glorious deeds of the Lord, about his power and his mighty wonders." NLT  


How do we do this?? I believe one way is through mentoring. Through sharing the power of God, the salvation found in Jesus Christ and then the wonderful work that is done through the Holy Spirit in and through our lives.  This is accomplished first and foremost in the most challenging times and also in times of obvious blessing. Sharing manifests itself in the way we have been created for passing on, through the talents, gifts and abilities that each one of us demonstrate everyday.  Consider what you have been given to share. It may be basic life skills such as raising a family, cleaning a house, working in the kitchen. Or it may be creativity through the arts, music, craft creations, painting etc.  You may have a gift of writing or sharing with others how to develop their spiritual walk, their prayer life or building friendships.  


So this year I hope to have many of you join me in an effort to share life with one another through Mentoring Moments provided by ChristLIFE Mentoring Ministries.  I would love to see women of all ages share in a variety of skills that would help each of us move closer to giving of ourselves to others through serving Christ.  


Please think about ways you can share.  Ideas would include:

• Efficient  homemaking skills
• Creative ways to minister such as scrapbooking, journaling etc.
• Hospitality
• Ministry Opportunities
• Serving in the community just to name a few.

We have so much we can share with each other. And it is a privilege to be unified in what brings honor and glory to the Lord even in practical ways. 

Please consider ways you can share and come on board with Mentoring Moments.  I would LOVE to hear from you. 

Denise